Suzanne's Second Estate

A web log of my thoughts, activities, life....

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Brilliant!

My friend Adam ponders breaking-up according to theology. A few of my favorites:

Atheist: The burden of proof is on you to establish the existence of this so-called “god” but I believe that if there was any such divine entity “it” would not want us to continue dating.

Intelligent Design Theorist: Our relationship bears the marks of irreducible complexity making it too difficult to explain by way of natural causes. Therefore, there the most reasonable conclusion is that we were designed to break up since things have gotten so complicated.

Calvinist: We were predestined before the creation of the world to break up according to God’s good pleasure. I am, on my own power, unable to break up with you apart from the irresistible draw of God’s sovereign grace which leads me to end this relationship. Those that truly break up will not get back together in the end.

Arminian: While you love me and have a wonderful plan for my life, I have the power to resist your will. If I did not, love would not be possible. For our relationship to be loving it needs to include the possibility of breaking up—something I am doing right now.

Theistic Evolutionist: The beauty and rhythm of random variation and natural selection over long periods of time has presented us with a world where God has shown us that our relationship is too biologically expensive to maintain and is destined for extinction.

11 Comments:

At 3:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is SO funny, I was JUST looking at this blog today before you posted it!! I guess it caught both of our eyes!!

 
At 7:30 PM, Blogger Michael said...

Hehe, that's quality. =)

 
At 10:56 PM, Blogger Suzanne said...

Michael,

Do we know each other? You look familiar.

 
At 10:47 AM, Blogger Matt said...

Hey, thanks for your comment. I've been a regular reader of Boundless for more than a year and I followed a link here from The Line.

 
At 12:11 AM, Blogger Michael said...

Suzanne,

I think I found your blog through I See Daylight somehow or another, but no we don't know each other otherwise that I'm aware of.

Have a fun weekend!

 
At 6:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is SO funny.

Can I use these?

I would only add a excuse I really heard from a Catholic friend, "I am leaving you because God has called me to a life of celibacy!"

Love the blog, Suzanne.

 
At 11:12 AM, Blogger Suzanne said...

John,

You'd want to ask Adam. I believe they're his originals. Thanks for stopping by.

 
At 2:11 PM, Blogger Michael said...

Ooooooh. Yes indeed, my grandparents do have a blueberry farm and I did win the geography bee back in the day (well, the local homeschooler geography bee anyway). I thought you looked familiar, but I've only been to Colorado Spring a couple times, so I assumed I didn't know you. What brought your family out to Colorado Springs? (other than the fact that its a cool state with great scenery) May I ask your age out of curiosity (just wondering what grade you would have been in compared to me when we were homeschooling. I'm 25 by the way).

Which other homeschoolers in this area did you usually hang around with?

Have a good one,
Mike

 
At 2:41 PM, Blogger Suzanne said...

I don't really remember names. Angela, Doug and Sarah (can't recall their last name). The Wileys. The Orefices.

 
At 2:55 PM, Blogger Michael said...

Wow, good memory! You may have also seen my brother, Dan win the Geography Bee. He's your age and won twice. (he was a bit better at that than me) We usually went to the "show-and-Tell" gatherings, testing and my favorite was the homeschool rollerskating. Although Luke Veach and I usually got in trouble for "skating way too fast" or "skating recklessly" or "spinning around way too haphazardly during the Hokey Pokey". Good times, good times. =)

Ah, I think Angela, Doug and Sarah's last name was Coumbs and we knew Doug pretty well. The Wiley's sound familiar as well.

What type of job brought you to Colorado? I'm inclined to think its a rather neat place from the few times I've been there. And I agree its pretty funny to happen upon your blog from Franks.

 
At 11:47 AM, Blogger Gail said...

ah, so so funny...one guy told me that he "disliked me more than he liked me" when he dumped me...yes, i do believe that sums it all up doesn't it? ;)

 

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